Human Error Cited in Rove Exorcism SNAFU

Washington, D.C., November 27, 2007 -- Human error was cited as the cause of the latest failure to exorcise what leading demonologists have termed "an unprecedented can of infernal worms" from the tormented soul of White House Special Advisor Karl Rove.

U.S. Military to Reduce Iraq Troop Levels From 138,000 to 163,000

Washington, D.C., June 19, 2006 -- Citing an improving security situation in key Iraqi provinces, U.S. military commanders say they have begun the long-promised task of reducing the American troop presence in Iraq, beginning with a reduction to about 163,000 from the current 138,000 scheduled over the next six months.

Rogue Societe Generale Trader "Just Got His Millions and Billions Mixed Up"

Paris, February 11, 2008 -- Jerome Kerviel, the so-called "rogue trader" whose actions resulted in a staggering $7.2 billion loss last month for French bank Societe Generale, simply got his millions and his billions confused, according to a French police officer who asked not to be identified.

Ashton Kutcher to Host Twitter's Reality TV Show

San Francisco, CA, July 13, 2009 -- Yesterday saw the surprising announcement that Twitter has brought Ashton Kutcher onboard to host its upcoming reality TV show. The show, Thy Tweeting Twit, is planned to debut this fall on FOX and will be direct sent from a location yet to be determined somewhere in the county of Warwickshire, England.

To tweet or not to tweet, that is the questionTo tweet or not to tweet, that is the question

Talking Points Delivery Mix-up Shakes American Right Wing

Washington, D.C., February 22, 2006 -- A mix-up in the labeling of conservative talking points transmitted by the Bush administration yesterday reportedly led to widespread confusion among the extensive network of radio, television and internet commentators used to disseminate the White House's message.

God Contrite About "Collateral Damage" in Huckabee Tornado Smite Attempt

Omnipresence, February 8, 2008 -- God, ruler of the universe and supreme arbiter of the weather, said today He was "deeply sorry" for the many casualties incurred during His attempt to smite Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee with a tornado during Super Tuesday primary election voting earlier this week.

Over 45 people were killed in the Southern states of Mississippi, Arkansas, Tennessee, and Kentucky when multiple tornadoes touched down with devastating results during the biggest day so far in the Republican and Democratic primary election season.

World Leader, Inc. World Leader at World Leading

January 1, 2522 -- //PRPressReleaseV22.2// -- World Leader, Inc. [NYSE:WLI], a world leader at world leading, announced today that for the third consecutive year it continues to lead the world at leading the world at world leading. The announcement was made at a press availability prior to the annual World Leader World Leader awards, presented annually by World Leader, Inc.

Nostalgic Bush Says FY09 Budget "Last Chance to Shaft the Poor"

Washington, D.C., February 12, 2008 -- An unusually somber and introspective President George W. Bush, presenting the details of his $3.1 trillion fiscal year 2009 budget proposal for members of the American Plutocrats Union, a conservative group, lamented that the budget proposal represents his “last chance to shaft the poor.” He urged the assembled audience to do “everything in their powers” to convince their elected representatives that the budget proposal represented an historic opportunity that may not return for a decade or more.

Earth Declares War on Venus, Loses

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Ecofrex, Moltopribate, Jebruarius 36, 2498 -- Salutoriations and benevoloriums. Earth has declared war on neighboring planet Venus, our sister sphere betwixt this, our planet, and that, our sun.

Venus, our sister sphere betwixt this, our planet, and that, our sunVenus, our sister sphere betwixt this, our planet, and that, our sun

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