Beijing, March 19, 2010 -- A press release issued by the Chinese government today announced the countrywide implementation of a new high-tech tracking initiative designed to "increase security and prosperity for all citizens of the People's Republic of China." The plan, detailed by Zhou Bo Kai, chief executive of China's Ministry of Public Security, will involve the implantation of long-range, high-frequency RFID devices in every one of China's estimated 1.4 billion citizens over the next 18 months.

Guatemala City, Guatemala, December 2, 2005 -- Fans and viewers of the popular CBS reality television show Survivor Guatemala: The Maya Empire were dealt a disappointing blow with the admission by the US Defense Department that it had inadvertently vaporized the entire remaining cast in a nuclear weapons testing blunder yesterday.

A spokesman for CBS said the incident was "regrettable", but added that the network plans to continue the series with a resurrected cast of surviving former Survivors under the name Survivor Guatemala: The Day After.

Mission, Texas, June 19, 2011 -- The Mexican border fence approved by President Bush in October, 2006 is now complete, but accolades for the project are few and far between.

Portion of Mexican border fence

The Secure Fence Act, which was touted by Republicans as a major border security initiative in the weeks leading up to the 2006 mid-term elections, is now viewed by many as a fiasco of the first order.

Chicago, IL, September 7, 2006 -- The increasingly vitriolic debate between religious conservatives and the scientific community took an unexpected turn yesterday when a voice confirmed to be that of God disparaged the idea of "intelligent design" as "a load of crap".