Bird Flu Drug Tamiflu's Primary Ingredient Washed Out in Mudslides

Atlanta, April 22, 2009 -- With bird flu, also known as avian flu, now confirmed to have mutated into a form that can be transmitted human-to-human, international disease control agencies are concerned by a new report that virtually all of this year's star anise crop, a vital component of Tamiflu grown only in four provinces of China, has been wiped out in a series of mudslides brought on by unseasonably strong tropical storms in the region.

DiCaprio Delights in Crime and Punishment: The Little Raskol

New York, October 22, 2007 -- From curtain up to final bow, the merriment and music never fade throughout Malcolm Purino's fabulous new production titled Crime and Punishment: The Little Raskol, which premiered Saturday at the Lunt-Fontanne Theatre on West 46th Street.

This hearty comedic remake of the classic novel by Fyodor Dostoevsky casts a bright new light on desolation, despair and moral imbroglios, spicing the bland fare of the Russian intelligentsia with a unique dash of American zest.

Al-Qaeda Hires Blackwater

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Moyock, North Carolina, July 8, 2008 -- While the United States continues to wage its war on terror in locations where terrorists are not originally present, Al-Qaeda (also known as: al-Qaida or al-Qa'ida or al-Qa'idah or al-¿Que?duh) has been stretched to its limits sending terrorists and trainers to assist locals fighting the Americans.

Fossilized Feces of Jesus Wreaks Havoc

Holy See, August 29, 2020 -- The recent discovery of a fossilized lump of human feces believed to have once emerged from the body of Jesus Christ, Son of God, has swept a whirlpool of excitement and controversy throughout the altars of the religious world.

Cave in which fossilized fecal matter of Jesus was discoveredCave in which fossilized fecal matter of Jesus was discovered

Wider Panama Canal Makes Room for Airbus A380

Isthmus of Panama, August 8, 2014 -- The ambitious, eight-year project to widen the Panama Canal is now complete, with the inaugural transit of the first Airbus A380 Superjumbo scheduled to take place on August 15.

Panama Canal (detail)Panama Canal (detail)

Super Bowl XLIII to Feature Real-time Biometric Player Data

Burbank, California, January 30, 2009 -- For the first time in Super Bowl history, Sunday's Super Bowl XLIII will feature a remarkable collection of live, real-time data on virtually every aspect of each player's physical and mental state –- while they're on the field.

This technological marvel, which will be premiered during Super Bowl XLIII, February 1, 2009 on NBC, is expected to, in the words of NBC spokesman Greg Polanski, "completely revolutionize the way viewers experience sports television."

Former President George W. Bush Born Again, Again

Marshmallow, TX, Sept. 17, 2009 -- A spokesman for former President George W. Bush announced today the retired politician and oil industry lobbyist has enjoyed a new spiritual rebirth. This makes for Bush's fourth rebirth since his withdrawal from public life, and his fifth overall, giving him a two-rebirth lead over former Attorney General John Ashcroft.

"He's quite pleased with this particular spiritual reawakening," said the spokesman. "This one, the President assures me, is going to stick."

Movie Review: Al Pacino Shines in "Scalito's Way"

New York, January 22, 2006 -- Al Pacino brings his epic screen presence to another gritty drama with this fall's release of Brian de Palma's Scalito's Way, a bleak and riveting film-noir post-prequel/remake slotted between a recent prequel, After Hours, and the original 1993 film masterpiece, Carlito's Way, both based on the books by Judge Edwin Torres.

Bush Denies Knowing Abramoff, DeLay, Rove, Rumsfeld, Cheney, Others

Washington, D.C., April 4, 2006 -- In unusually direct and brusque remarks at the White House Rose Garden today, President George W. Bush categorically denied knowledge of or acquaintance with Jack Abramoff, Tom DeLay, and many other primary figures in the ongoing and escalating series of scandals afflicting Republicans in Washington.

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