Bush Withdraws Justice Samuel Alito's Supreme Court Nomination

Washington, D.C., March 2, 2006 -- President George W. Bush said today he will be withdrawing his nomination of Justice Samuel Alito to the United States Supreme Court, citing "second thoughts". According to President Bush, Justice Alito, who was swept into the court on a initial tide of nearly universal approval among conservatives, "isn't working out exactly like I planned it".

Pledging "Fresh, Clean Start", Disney Clones Britney

Burbank, CA, July 19, 2008 -- A spokesman for The Walt Disney Company, creator of erratic pop diva Britney Spears, said the company has decided to "cut its losses" and genetically engineer a new, improved Britney Spears using cutting-edge cloning technology.

Britney Spears (version I)Britney Spears (version I)

President Carter Tells All on Three Gorges Disaster Relief Trip

Washington, DC March 3, 2010 -- Former Presidents Jimmy Carter and George W. Bush had "differing views" during their recently completed efforts to raise funds for the victims of the Three Gorges Flood. Jimmy Carter elaborated on what those differing views were during a live interview last night with Leslie Stahl on 60 Minutes.

While President Carter was pleased with the $267 million donated by Americans as a result of the work coordinated by President Bush and himself, Carter appears to be more relieved to not have to work side-by-side with President Bush any longer.

President Clinton Jails 938,000 Illegal Enemy Combatants

Washington, D.C., February 2, 2009 -- A mere two weeks into her tenure, President Hillary Rodham Clinton has announced a sweeping roundup of illegal enemy combatants, the first step in a comprehensive program designed to protect the American people from potential terrorist activities.

In accordance with the Military Commissions Act of 2006, the nearly one million detainees will be held indefinitely without trial or recourse to legal counsel until such time as the President determines they no longer pose a threat to the United States and its allies.

George W. Bush Files For Chapter 11 Moral Bankruptcy Protection

Washington, D.C., March 12, 2006 -- The Bush administration has filed for Chapter 11 moral bankruptcy protection, White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan announced today. The unusual move, Mr. McClellan explained, is in reaction to the growing spate of scandals that have brought presidential stock in both national and international markets to the brink of collapse.

The filing will protect the Bush administration from moral creditors while a court-appointed ethical overseer evaluates the administration's moral debt.

Bob Logger's Blogging Blog

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Pleasant Hills, CA June 23, 2008 -- Bob Logger is a blogger, but not your typical blogger. Bob blogs on his blog about blogs and better blogging. Whilst many bloggers blog about blogs, Bob Logger's blog, The Bob Logger Blog is a blog that blogs other blogs that blog blogs as well as blogs examples of better blogging techniques - a sort of pedagogue blog.

Lipodiesels Shine at 2010 LA Auto Show

Los Angeles, November 29, 2010 -- The wraps are off at the 2010 LA Auto Show, and this year the neologism on everyone's lips is the hottest hybrid concept of the millennium: the Ford Lipodiesels™. Three new Ford models featuring the innovative energy-saving technology are scheduled for unveiling in the coming days, and the excitement is palpable.

DiCaprio Delights in Crime and Punishment: The Little Raskol

New York, October 22, 2007 -- From curtain up to final bow, the merriment and music never fade throughout Malcolm Purino's fabulous new production titled Crime and Punishment: The Little Raskol, which premiered Saturday at the Lunt-Fontanne Theatre on West 46th Street.

This hearty comedic remake of the classic novel by Fyodor Dostoevsky casts a bright new light on desolation, despair and moral imbroglios, spicing the bland fare of the Russian intelligentsia with a unique dash of American zest.

Bill O'Reilly Wins Bill O'Reilly Award

Newark, February 12, 2008 -- Former television and radio broadcasting personality Bill O'Reilly announced today that the nationwide search for a winner in the prestigious first annual Bill O'Reilly Awards for Excellence in Broadcast Journalism has resulted in a surprise victor: Bill O'Reilly.

The WingnutThe Wingnut

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