Harriet Miers Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings: Transcript
Washington, D.C., November 16, 2005 -- Following is the complete transcript of the Harriet Miers confirmations hearings held by the Senate Judiciary Committee November 7-15, 2005. Following the confirmation hearings a decision will be made by the Committee regarding whether or not to recommend Harriet Miers, a born-again former Texas lottery supervisor, to the full Senate for confirmation as Associate Justice of the United States Supreme Court.
The complete transcript follows:
Transcript begins -----
Limbo Eliminated; Status of Purgatory in 'State of Limbo'
Rome, Italy February 12, 2006 -- The new catechism of Roman Catholic doctrine that did away with Limbo and was approved by Pope Benedict XVI in the middle of December 2005 threw the state of Limbo into a state of chaos. This catechism changing the eternal residence for those souls included in both the Limbo of the Fathers (limbus partum) and Limbo of Children (limbus infantium) by moving them straight to Heaven has left many souls wondering what happened and why.
Jennifer Aniston Breaks Wind
Los Angeles, June 12, 2009 -- Jennifer Aniston reportedly broke wind last Thursday shortly after completing an afternoon snack that may have included rice crackers and cottage cheese, leading to speculation that the highly visible television and film actress may break wind again at some point in the near or distant future. An unidentified companion who was observed dining with Jennifer Aniston at the time did not react visibly to the occurrence. Jennifer Aniston was unavailable for comment on this dramatic bombshell.
AutoChat Fills the Solo Driver's Cell Phone Void
Singapore, August 29, 2008 -- With worldwide automotive cell phone use becoming a thing of the past due to increasingly stringent safety restrictions, Singapore-based CarMate Industries has announced a new product that aims to fill the resulting void in conversation: AutoChat. AutoChat, according to company spokesman Ni Kwai, is a fully-automated, AI-capable automotive speaking companion mainly targeting solo drivers that can engage in lively and prolonged "real-time" conversations on a wide variety of topics.
Surprise Rapture Disrupts Bush's 2007 State of the Union Address
Washington, D.C., January 24, 2007 -- President Bush's 2007 State of the Union address bumped into an unexpected snag with the "rapturing" of approximately 150,000 Fundamentalist Christians yesterday, Washington sources said.
Remains of raptured former Bush supporters
Avant News Job Interview Tips: How to Fake the Liver Biopsy
Macon, Georgia, September 22, 2010 -- A recent survey performed by the Online Job-Seekers Bureau found that increasingly stringent rules for potential job applicants now frequently include such measures as requiring that liver biopsies, brain samples, and loyalty oaths be submitted along with a resume.A spokesman for the Online Job-Seekers Bureau said he found the trend "understandable, but troubling".
Quantum Particles Have Tiny Faces
Pork Barrel, UT, August 30, 2019 -- Researchers at the prestigious Umberthumb Institute's Very Tiny Particle Refractor announced yesterday a remarkable new insight into the characteristics of the numerous and disparate subatomic particles that form the building blocks of atoms. Data from the recently enhanced reflector have allowed scientists to "view" the particles for the first time, with astounding results.
Cheney Offers to Stay on as Veep
Washington, D.C., March 12, 2008 -- In a move that surprised most pundits, Dick Cheney has offered to “stay on” as Vice President following the conclusion of President Bush's final term.
The offer, which the vice president announced during his regular 7:30 am interview on Fox Morning Talking Points, was extended to both Republican nominee John McCain and Democratic nominee Barack Obama.
Wingding Institute Awarded Nobel Peace Prize
Oslo, Norway October 10, 2011 -- The Norwegian Nobel Committee shocked the world yesterday when it announced that the controversial Wingding Institute had won the 2011 Nobel Peace Prize beating out such favorites as the United Nations, World Bank and the International Institute for Democracy and Electoral Assistance (IDEA).
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